🌍 The Failed Experiment
Globturd scientists proudly announced a new project to “finally prove” Earth’s curvature. They set up lasers, rulers, and GPS systems across a long stretch of land, convinced they’d find the expected drop.
Instead, their results shocked them:
No curve detected.
“We expected an 8-inch drop per mile squared,” one scientist said nervously.
“But the measurements came back perfectly flat. Must be… faulty equipment.”
🔬 The Excuses Begin
Within hours, the team issued a statement blaming:
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“Refraction”
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“Atmospheric distortion”
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And even “optical illusions caused by swamp gas.”
Critics, however, pointed out the obvious:
“If you try 100 times and keep getting flat results, maybe the Earth is just flat.”
😂 Flat Earther Reactions
Flat Earth groups erupted in laughter:
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Memes appeared showing lasers pointing straight across flat water.
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One viral post joked: “Scientists finally find the curve… it was in their funding check.”
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Another said: “If the Earth is round, why do their rulers still measure flat?”
🚨 NASA Stays Silent
NASA, usually quick to defend its globe model, stayed unusually quiet. Insiders claim they’re worried that more independent experiments will expose the same “flat” results.
🧠 Final Thought
The harder globturds try to find the curve, the flatter things seem to get.
Maybe it’s time they admit what their own data is screaming: the Earth isn’t round — it’s flat.
